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am I overreacting
Posted: Fri Oct 22, 2010 6:04 pm
by madali
Wasnt sure where to put this but here goes. Ok those who know me well know that I am usually pretty easy going but I am really angry at the moment and wanted some advice to whether you think I am over reacting.
I have been working in a different department at work and am going back to my old role in just over a week. Everyone has commented on what a great job I have done in my current role. My old boss has had discussions previously that he thinks I play too much poker outside of work and requested that I stop playing of an evening. I have cut my in venue games back dramatically to keep him happy but today he advises me he wants me not to play at all if I am working the next day as he needs me to be on time for work. I have always been early for all of my shifts ( usually more than 30 minutes!) and after 15 years at the same job have never been late. This comment was not said privately but in front of everyone in the office ( over 30 people and major management). I have had some time off over the last 2 years due to a health issue which required numerous surgeries but have always provided a doctors certificate. Touch wood I have been fit and healthy for over 3 months now and have had no time off. I would not be having an issue if the comment was around my health but when it was about punctuality and I was ready to blow my top. I have never had any issue with any other managers and was really angry at this comment. I didn't blow my top but when I said "excuse me I have never been late to anything in my life" he responded "And we don't want poker cause you to start"
Am I over reacting or is this really an inappropriate comment?
Re: am I overreacting
Posted: Fri Oct 22, 2010 6:27 pm
by 666HARPS666
G'day G ,
1st do you a have a union @ your work ? If so I would go straight to them . It is harassment , what you do outside of working hours has nothing to do with your employer . & for him too say it in front of workmates is wrong . If you do have a union next time he wants to say something to you make sure its in front or a union rep .
Otherwise i would be going above his head , Tell the big boss what was said & how you feel threatened & harassed .
It is not right for someone to act in that manner .
Me i'd either walk away when he went to speak to me or tell him where to go . But thats just me .
Good luck with situation & don't be bullied
cheers [_])
Re: am I overreacting
Posted: Fri Oct 22, 2010 6:31 pm
by Sinitster
tough one ,
agree mate
i wooda replied ... "when it does , i want YOU to be the first to tell me"
which job would you prefer to do ?
Re: am I overreacting
Posted: Fri Oct 22, 2010 6:33 pm
by AceLosesKing
Totally out of line IMO, if what you do in your time doesn't affect how you work, then he has no issue.
Re: am I overreacting
Posted: Fri Oct 22, 2010 7:04 pm
by madali
Thanks everyone I was so upset and really dumbfounded by the comment. Not sure if the comment was to bring me back into line ready for my return but once I have had a chance to calm down I know it will be ok. He is the type of manager who does not like to do to much and find a way of getting out of doing work. Where as I on the other hand like things to be done correctly and on time and am willing to put in the hard effort to ensure this occurs. If push comes to shove I can ensure that he is kept very busy doing the job he is employed to do

I was just concerned that I was making too much of this and over reacting. As I said I have always had a great relationship with my managers and am always the first to jump up and assist when they needed help.
Harps I am a member of the union but think this is something that I can deal with myself.
Re: am I overreacting
Posted: Fri Oct 22, 2010 7:34 pm
by bennymacca
wow, that is completely disgusting
if you were rocking up to work late or dog tired because you sat up all night, then fair enough, but it doesn't sound like this is happening.
sounds like he thinks you are a gambling addict or something.
i would be talking to the union, that is completely unacceptable in my opinion, if it is not affecting your work. if it is affecting it in any way (besides punctuality) then he might have a point, but other than that he has no business in your personal life if your job is not affected.
Re: am I overreacting
Posted: Fri Oct 22, 2010 7:55 pm
by muzzington
Sounds like he has negative preconceptions about Poker/Gambling and is being unfair or he was a problem gambler himself and is now reformed.
Challenge him to HU to find out.
Re: am I overreacting
Posted: Fri Oct 22, 2010 9:42 pm
by gmatical
muzzington wrote:Challenge him to HU to find out.
LOL!
You boss sounds like a dick - I would go straight to the union too - this will ensure it is never a problem again.
And I would probably downplay my volume of poker play just to appease him a little
Re: am I overreacting
Posted: Fri Oct 22, 2010 11:36 pm
by JMACK007
Hi Gayle,
I sympathise with you, but am really confused here....
How the hell does your Boss even know you play poker????
It is very wrong for him to tell you not to if it is not affecting your work, but really, if you have always turned up well and truly on time and helped out the way you have explained, then why does he have a problem, and especially, why is poker the issue????
This is really a strange one to me....
Re: am I overreacting
Posted: Fri Oct 22, 2010 11:48 pm
by Brett Kay
Truth be told this is a difficult situation to handle.
Not all cut and dry.
The best way would be to show him a night of poker. It starts at 6pm get a meal, then the game, out of the venue by 11pm. In bed (don't mention the online games). Then ready for work the next day.
Obviously his experience of poker is the one portrayed by the media. In that shady rooms, smoke, people getting beat up.
If you take him to a local game and let him form his own opinion that Pub poker is a little different to what he is picturing, and get him to grudgingly apologise.
Turning around and telling him that the comment was unwarranted and that he should not be getting involved in your business will most likely get the negative response that you do not want. I.e he thinks you've have changed, getting defensive about your past time and trying to deflect. Classic signs of being addicted.
Think the majority of my coworkers know that i am more gambler than drinker, but it doesn't affect my work. Will be interesting when i have to go to Perth for Railway stakes. could end ugly for me at the racetrack
