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Just purchased a book..

Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 2:56 pm
by David
Had a Borders voucher, 20% off any business or self finance book.

Looked around for a while, nothing grabbed me. Then I found a book called EMERGENCY, which claims to be a NY Times Best Seller.

I have no idea what it's about, other than the subtext on the front says "This book will save your life", and the chapter names.

It's the chapter names that made my buy it:

- Birthday Clowns to Avoid
- Tips on Death Cult Etiquette
- The Use of Philosophy as an Excuse to Cancel Plans
- A Beginner's Guide to Evil in the 20th Century
- Effects of Schoolteachers on Psychosexual Development
- Calculate Your Safety if X = Terrorists, Y = Distance and Z = How much You've Pissed them Off
- How to Become Immortal in One Easy Step
- An Argument for Getting Into Cars With Strangers
- The Britney Spears School of Pregnant Surfing
- How to Protect Yourself From Inflation, Hackers, and Celine Dion
- Why Knocking Up a Brazilian Woman Can Save Your Life
- How to Alienate Your Family in 60 Seconds or Less
- War, Genocide, and Other Real-Estate Scams
- Calculate the Odds That You Are in Jail Now
- life Advice From the World's Friendliest Nazi
- Just Say NO to Cheerleading
- The Philosophy of the Sphincter
- Family-Proof Ammunition and Other Tips for Home Shooting
- Why You Should Think of the Zoo as a Restaurant
- Never Drink From the Bowl
- How to be 90% Certain You'll Escape Cannibals
- Activities for Irritating Your Girlfriend
- A Ninja's Guide to Bringing Weapons on Airplanes
- A Cross Dresser's Guide to Combat
- Iceland is the New Caribbean
- Proper Care and Handling of Hawaiian Tropic Girls
- Secrets to Civilizing Lone Wolves
- Things to do When You're a Dual Citizen


I have no idea what it's all about and I don't care.. I'll find out as I read it :)

Re: Just purcahsed a book..

Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 2:58 pm
by AceLosesKing
Sounds like fun :)

Re: Just purcahsed a book..

Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 3:00 pm
by bennymacca
sounds pretty funny just from the chapter titles

Re: Just purcahsed a book..

Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 3:17 pm
by trishan
"Why you should think of the zoo as a restaurant"

:D

Re: Just purcahsed a book..

Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 3:19 pm
by Bacon
War, Genocide, and Other Real-Estate Scams

:geek:

Re: Just purcahsed a book..

Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 3:28 pm
by AceLosesKing
David wrote: - Why Knocking Up a Brazilian Woman Can Save Your Life


Scott.

David wrote: - Proper Care and Handling of Hawaiian Tropic Girls


old-man daryl.

Re: Just purchased a book..

Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 10:33 pm
by troyh
Sounds like a good read.
Would like to see a review when you've read it Dave

Re: Just purcahsed a book..

Posted: Sat Jul 18, 2009 4:13 pm
by AJG
Bacon wrote:War, Genocide, and Other Real-Estate Scams

:geek:

That grabbed my attention to! Maybe 'Real Estate scam' is a good acronym for war :lol:

Hmmm, Calulcate the odds I am in jail now.... Well I feel safe in the shower, so...

Activities for Irritating Your Girlfriend: Hands up all the guys who need help with THIS one???

Just Say NO to Cheerleading: Good advice, but don't say no to CheerleadERS!

The Philosophy of the Sphincter: He's just talkin out of his @$$ in this chapter.

'Calculate Your Safety if X = Terrorists, Y = Distance and Z = How much You've Pissed them Off': Should this really be Y1 = Distance and Y2 = Range of their suicide bombers...?
My best Guess:
Spoiler:
1 / ( X^2 [they have mates] * Z^3 [they really are sensitive little fanatics] ) + log(Y)
Basically, for all X, Z such that X > 0, Z > 0, Safety = 0
Y is simply a measure of how much (little?) time you have to cashout your poker bankroll and get your affairs in order...


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Sounds like a fun read!